Shame On You : How To Be A Woman In The Age Of Mortification
In the spirit of Rebecca Traister's Good and Mad and Roxane Gay's Bad Feminist comes a courageous, in-depth investigation into the modern epidemic of shame in our societyāwhat it is, why women are uniquely susceptible, and how we can shift the shame off our plates and live our best lives in an over-exposed, image-obsessed world.
For millions of women, shame is a vicious predator. It tells us we are less than, that we are unworthy. We try everything to escape shameāignoring it, intellectualizing it, and even, ironically, shaming ourselves for feeling it. The reality is that women experience shame more frequently and more intensely than menāa direct result, as acclaimed journalist Melissa Petro explains, of a patriarchal culture that āurges women to feel bad about themselves, and then punishes them when they do.ā Why canāt we figure out how to break the shame cycle once and for all?
In Shame on You, Petro takes on the issue of womenās shame directly with an unflinching look at the social systems that encourage women to believe we are deeply inadequate. From shameās beginnings ( Maybe sheās born with it? Nope, itās misogyny.) to its effect on our lives as adults (How the humiliation of ābad womenā affects us all.), shame poisons our friendships, romantic relationships, and work lives. But it doesnāt have to be that way. Blending investigative reporting, science, literature, and hundreds of womenās personal storiesāincluding her own shameful account of winding up as an unwitting New York Post cover girlāPetro offers us a new way forward. No matter what you do, she explains, there is no escaping being judged. And yet, the women we can becomeāsometimes as a consequence of shame, rather than in spite of itāare powerful indeed. And maybe thatās what others are afraid of.